Some people may not know that I love to sing! That's because I actually have tried to hide it. Why would someone do that? Well, in my case - even though it's always been my secret dream to be a singer - I'm not a performer! I've always thought, "If only I could be famous, without the fame." My dream is to share my voice - and my love of music - with many, without having to see them or perform for them. I also am not sure of my talent? I mean my family thinks I sing well, but they're my family - they're kinda biased! I've never had a voice teacher and it seems like anyone who can sing well and is any good, has been professionally trained at one point or time.
Sigh, the reality is that I'm just not confident enough in my ability or myself to be able to share with anyone except my family, until this month. If you can believe it, I actually volunteered to sing in church - a solo no less! For the first time since 1998! I discovered several things about myself:
1. I can actually sing louder than I thought I could.
2. Even though I was wracked with nerves - I still pulled it off.
3. This is a dream I still want to pursue.
4. I want my children to know that their mother loves music!
5. I no longer want to hide my talent.
What a blessing that experience has been for me to realize some things about myself. It has caused me to think, "How many times do we hide our talents because we fear what others will think about us?"
Another question to add to your ending one, Is how many times do we hide our talent because we fear ourselves? Many times it is fear of others but often it is a lack of confidence or a fear of our self (not being good enough). I guess the next question to ask is "if we don't feel our talent is "good enough" for everyone then who is is "good enough" for? Only our family? Because they love us? So other people aren't capable of loving us like our family does? Just some thoughts that came into my head as I have thought about my own inhibitions for myself and public singing. Back to work. :) Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Hill! As always, I love your insights and your ability to dig a little deeper. I believe my experience with sharing my voice also allowed others to see another side of me and I allowed them the chance to accept or reject that part of me. As the person in charge of music said to me on Sunday, "When we sing, we give a gift and allow others to accept it or reject it."
ReplyDeletei knew you could sing before you even did lol and not only you have one talent but two and the other one is excellent personal expression through writing! so I would encourage you to use the same confidence as you do in writing the beautiful stories on your blog and apply them in expressing your singing abilities (talent skill). I now know who I am gonna hire to sing at my next big ceremony, if ever will be one LOL...hint hint..
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad to know this about you!!! We'll have to pull you in on a "music moment" Sunday sometime when you can sneak away from your other ward to share your talent with us!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm glad I just found your blog. :D Happy day for me.
Amy - I don't know about that "music moment" thought...? Lol! I'm glad my blog made your day, because I LOVE yours too!
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